It’s been an odd week.
I have not been writing this week (well not much) as I have so much work to catch up on. That always generates disquiet as have not really written properly for almost three weeks (yikes!) and I need to write!!! NEED. So roll on Monday when normal service WILL resume, in spite of my mounting workload.
I am first and foremost a writer and I need to write.
So this odd state of limbo, of disquiet, this unusual sense of being unsettled this week, comes partly from not writing and knowing my agent is so so busy I am still waiting for news on the new novel. Of course, I understand but feel the disquiet building the longer I wait. As writers we know to be patient, but still…
There are developments house-wise but next week is when I know what I think I need to know (cryptic right?) so I am waiting and that also creates a sense of poise.This is another biggie that will change the direction my life takes.
There are developments with Malcolm’s work (hopefully anyway, as he needs more of a certain income)… it’s all change at the gym. We move into a fancy new huge premises that we went to look at yesterday. Wow. Love it! But nothing is quite certain yet about how this affects his work, so again we wait with poised breath. On the brink… everything crossed, everything.
We look at a car tomorrow (hopefully) … as we need something newer, so we’re waiting to see if that is okay. Okay so that’s a smaller change, but it’s all part the steps being taken towards our new future 🙂
New home (we hope), new gym, new car… change.
Ever noticed how excitement feels a lot like that disquiet… I guess because we want it but we need things to happen to achieve it.
And all of this personal stuff is happening against a backdrop of great unrest generally. With dismal leadership and uncertainty in the current political disarray in Britain we can only hope for a happy future. Urgh.
So yeah, we’re all in limbo and we all feel uncertain.
As you all know I am a driven and passionate person. I like to look forward but I like to feel settled. I don’t like this gut feeling of not knowing and in many ways not being able to control these things, that’s where unrest festers. If it’s all down to me I work and work and learn and keep moving, but sometimes when our lives are placed into the hands of others, we can do little but WAIT and HOPE. So we do…
I have said on here many times recently that we must embrace change and we must. On a very personal level these are all very exciting changes, but until deals are done and dotted lines are signed there remains excitement and hope but the squeals are suppressed.
Our new future is so close I can picture it. I can hold it in my mind — the new life I see for ourselves — but until we pass from limbo to certainty we have no choice but to wait. Breaths are held. Pens are poised. Squeals are suppressed. But one thing I know for certain — whatever happens — everything will work out in the end — because it always does.
So my message for the day, the week, the year, is this: look ahead (as I have been saying all week)… and step into the future with head held high.
And wow if it all works out it’s gonna be ONE HUGE party!
So have a great weekend everyone, whatever you do, enjoy it, be kind to one another, and tell your loved one how much you appreciate them. That is all! 🙂